You do know that these two aren’t exactly synonymous don’t you.
Anyway, I was at the airport the other day sending off my sis to Sydney when I witnessed a tense argument between a couple. It seems they had missed their check-in time by 10 minutes and the guy was ticking off his gf/wife for taking her time to pack, causing them to leave their house late. The girl retorted that they were late because the guy called the taxi late. They weren’t throwing things at each other or anything but they were clearly pissed off at each other.
I’m sure there’ve been times when you were utterly convinced you’re right but it did nothing to improve a tense situation. So what do you do, harp on the fact that you were right regardless or zip up for the sake of maintaining peace?
Some of my friends would say if you’re right, you’re right and you should never step back and lose face, even if it cost you your relationship. Some would say its not worth a fight, just relax and let your partner be victorious. Focus on the long term, he or she will discover the truth some day.
I dunno. Does being right actually have any value in a relationship? Would stepping back mean you’re a chicken or a hero?
What would you do?
i used to believe that you should always fight for what you believe is right. on hindsight, it might have been a little rash.. maybe even selfish, when you’re obviously not doing anything to make the situation better.
i now believe as long as you know you’re right, it’s suffice enough to let time prove that fact.. even if it means holding back your words and swallowing your pride.
however, easier said than done!=]
Amen to that Liss
Perhaps philosophically it does seem right being right. But after getting married, I came to understand that proving yourself to be right is not always the right thing to do…
At the end of the day, it doesn’t matter. I will try to focus on the solution, not the reason.
But like Liss said, ‘easier said than done’!
Hi Kay, yes I’d agree that 1+1=3 if that makes me happy
or would I… err..
Personally I have seen couples who have a lot of differences, yet they could be happy. They do argue sometimes, but what I notice about them is they are usually not self righteous. These couples are those who have learned to value their partner’s thoughts and feelings and know how to adjust themselves. Sometimes, in a relationship it is better to agree to disagree although we may be right. It keeps the peace. For me, happiness matters and happiness comes with self responsibility.
Hi Kathiroly, yup that’s the key word – not righteous. Perhaps the married ones can tell us if its true that the length of marriage and ego are inversely proportional….
It’s so funny, I just wrote on blog on this late last night. Bascially, I just don’t want my ego running the show. I may speak up and try to make my case, or take a stand, or I might “forget about it” – the main this is my motivation (fear or love). I said it better in the blog: http://clergyoncallministries.com/index.aspx?TypeContent=BLOGS (It’s only my second attempt at blogging ever.)
hh… luv it ))